


Still Here

by bookworm03



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Enemies to Lovers, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-04 08:24:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6650047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm03/pseuds/bookworm03
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leslie will always remember everything about her very first meeting with Ben Wyatt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Still Here

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 3 prompt challenge! 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy! Thank you so much for reading! Comments/kudos/etc are the most amazing thing ever and always put a smile on my face at the end of the day.

Leslie will always remember everything about her very first meeting with Ben Wyatt.

She was twelve, a seventh grader visiting Pawnee Central High for the Christmas concert series, and Ben was a ninth grader whose homeroom happened to sit in the same row as her class.

“Move over,” were the first two words he had ever said to her.

Leslie’s head had swung up and her gaze had narrowed.

“Excuse me?” she’d snapped. He’d rolled his deep brown eyes and gestured down the line.

“I want to sit here. Move over.”

“Well, this was my seat, selection,  _ sir _ , and if this is where I choose to be you don’t get to tell me - ”

She squawked when her  _ lifted her up and deposited her into the next chair _ .

“I said move it, shrimp.”

Leslie had never wanted to punch someone in the face so badly in her life.

*****

Fifteen year old Leslie glances up at seventeen year old Ben in stupid sunglasses. A group of them had decided to go camping for the weekend and Ben is there because he’s boning Cindy Eckhart who’s a sophomore as well.

“What’s up, Knope?”

“Nothing. Go away, I’m fishing and you’ll scare them away with your loud, annoyingness.”

“You’re still mad at me about a thing that happened two years ago?” he arches an eyebrow.

“I’m not mad at you, I just think you’re a jerk and I don’t want to have to stand next to you, so either go away or move over and stop talking and fish like a normal person from Minnesota.”

His mouth twitches annoyingly as he steps to the right and asks if this is far enough.

“Illinois wouldn’t be far enough!” she snaps.

When she catches Ben and Cindy hardcore making out by the campfire that night she thinks the moon wouldn’t be far enough.

*****

“Leslie hasn’t made out with anyone ever,” Mark declares from his seat in the bowling alley. Leslie whirls so quickly she almost drops her ball and ruins her near-perfect game. Ann looks horrified.

“I mean, that’s...you should really just get that over with. You’re about to be a junior and you’ve never even...that’s pretty…”

“Lame,” Tom finishes. Ann’s brow furrows and Leslie watches her best friend mentally preparing to come to her defense. Ann will say something about how gross makeouts with high school boys are anyway, and it’s not that big a deal…

But before she can, a voice interrupts them.

“Uh, dude, back off,” Ben Wyatt, about to go away to college, appears behind them. Everyone turns, including Leslie, and Mark scoffs.

“Come on, man, you know it’s weird she’s the only junior who’s never made out with anyone - ”

“We’ve made out.”

Leslie’s eyes bulge out of her sockets and Ann squeaks.

“No way.”

“Way,” Ben rests a hand on her shoulder. “At a party last winter. And it was great.”

“It was? - It was!” Leslie puffs out her chest and squares her shoulders. “It was great. You were great too, by the way.”

Ben bites his lip and it’s probably the most attractive he’s ever looked to her.

Not...okay yes, Ben is sort of easy on the eyes even when he’s a jerk, but all not-shaven with tousled hair and going off to college? She’s...into this.

“Can I join you?”

A few people say  _ sure _ , including Ann, who is shooting Leslie a curious look and Mark sort of scowls. Ben punches his name into the computer and nudges her gently.

“Move over, Knope.”

She obliges without argument.

“I thought you’d be seeing Cindy.”

“Oh, yeah, I am later.”

For some reason her stomach twists, and she lets herself imagine Ben and Cindy having sex and thinks about how great of a kisser Cindy Eckhart probably is.

And Ben too. He has a nice mouth.

Crap, she really shouldn’t be thinking that.

*****

She’d know that messy mop of brown hair anywhere.

He’s standing at the coffee maker in the common area of her dorm room, hair sticking out at ridiculous angles. Leslie blinks.

“What are  _ you _ doing here? You’re supposed to be in Minnesota.”

She catches him smirking and bumps him with her hip.

“Move over, Wyatt. I need to get my mug.”

Ben hands her a coffee mug with penguins on it without asking.

“How did you…”

“Lucky guess.”

He isn’t sexy, not even with a scruffy jaw and eyes heavy with sleep and a cute butt in plaid pajama pants.

“What are you doing here?”

“I transferred.”

“Why?”

“Because I missed...Indiana.”

It sounds like Indiana is code for something. Maybe Cindy Eckhart. They broke up two months into Ben starting college and she was frenching the quarterback two weeks after that. Leslie pushes Ben over with her hip and pours the coffee, can of whipped cream tucked under her arm.

“Why are you here? Sleeping with a freshman?”

“I’m an RA.”

Leslie almost sloshes hot liquid all over herself. “What?!”

“I don’t have any friends to live with so I’m an RA. Plus, it saves me a ton of money.”

“You’re...you’re seriously going to be living in my dorm all year?”

“All year, Knope.”

Crap on a...a year of teasing and taunting from Ben Wyatt? Could her first weekend at college get any worse?

“Well...you better not get in my way or drink all the coffee or eat all of my whipped cream! Or…”

Ben licks his lips and gives a curt nod.

“See you around, Knope.”

****

She's sitting in the hallway, highlighting passages of her novel for American lit when he calls her name.

“Uh, why are you sitting outside your room?”

“There are no seats in the common room and my roommate is... _ otherwise engaged _ ,” she gestures to the scrunchie hanging off the doorknob and Ben pulls a face.

“Gross.”

“Yes.”

He grabs Leslie by the wrist without asking permission and suddenly she's on her feet and Ben's holding her book.

“What’s happening?”

“You can study in my room while you wait.”

Ben’s room is massive, with a queen-sized bed and an ensuite and it’s just...a million times better than hers. Leslie pictures herself waking up in this room, puttering over to the bathroom to brush her teeth and shower at leisure…

Maybe she’ll be an RA next year.

It doesn’t explain why she sees herself in the t-shirt Ben is currently wearing. Her cheeks color as Ben offers her a chair and motions to the desk.

“Study away.”

She checks her room three times in the next several hours and it’s still “occupied”. She even tries calling the phone in it but her roommate, Rebecca, refuses to answer. Leslie sighs and misses Ann desperately in that moment.

“You wanna watch Mary Poppins? It’s just starting.”

Leslie looks up, taking in Ben’s sprawled out, supine form. His arms are behind his head and he’s flexing his toes.

“I’ll make popcorn.”

Popcorn is apparently the magic word that causes Leslie to move over to the bed and seat herself on it. She doesn’t lean against the pillows, just folds her legs beneath her, but Ben gives her knee a small pat before heading out to get snacks.

_ Popcorn _ is just excellent and important and something she wishes to partake in, that’s why she’s watching the movie.

It has nothing to do with the way Ben winks and gestures at her.

She’s more tired than she’s ever been in her entire life in her first semester of college and falls asleep to Steppin’ Time.

When she awakens a different movie is playing, Ben’s still there and she’s tucked under a blanket having been scooted down the mattress.

He turns onto his side and smiles at Leslie in a way that causes her heart to start pounding. The lights are off, save for the TV, and his face is all cute and grown up and his lips are red and plump and it’s the hardest she’s ever thought about kissing anyone.

But she can’t do that, kiss Ben Wyatt; that would be the worst mistake in the worst.

She tells Ann all about it when she finally gets back to her room and Ann is concerningly quiet. When she asks Ann what she’s thinking she tells Leslie that maybe Ben’s not so bad.

Leslie falls asleep thinking about his mouth at 4AM.

*****

She’d almost be okay with kissing Ben.

If he wanted to, of course. She didn’t care either way, but if it would make him happy to put his mouth on hers she might let him because he’d been nice enough to let her hang out in his room when she couldn’t get into hers.

One Friday, after her last class, Leslie marches over to tell him exactly this. She has a whole speech prepared where she will say  _ Wyatt, if you want to make out with me I’d probably let you  _ and see what happens. She’s turned the corner to his dorm room when she hears his voice and stills. A light, flirty giggle follows, and Leslie sees Ben move to unlock his door, a girl almost as tall as him with a long curtain of dark brown hair pushing her lips to the back of his neck.

His hands tremble just a touch as he turns the key and they fall inside, seeking out each other’s lips.

Her eyes start stinging for some reason she can’t quite place. It’s very dusty in the dorm, so probably allergies.

But obviously Ben has no interest in making out, so that’s that. She’ll make sure to tell Ann the next time they talk.

Just so she’s aware of the situation.

She sort of avoids Ben for the rest of college after that.

****

“Leslieeeeeeee, take off your cover up and get some sun. I need you to vacation harder with me.”

In exactly two weeks Leslie is starting her new job at the Pawnee Parks and Recreation Department and in three weeks Ann Perkins will become the most beautiful, employed nurse in the state of Indiana. (Which is so much better than Michigan. Ann’s first nursing job had been in Michigan and she’s finally coming home and it’s the best news Leslie has ever gotten.)

They’re in Florida. Siesta Key to be precise.

She doesn’t like being in Florida.

She feels... _ obligated _ when she’s in Florida. She can’t come back from Florida and tell her mother she never visited his gravesite even though it makes her so, so sad. She thinks of her dad all the time, writes to him in her dream journal and misses him with this dull ache in her chest that will never fully go away. Why does she have to go to the cemetery?

Ann’s dozing off on a lounge chair under an umbrella when the guilt finally overcomes her.

Leslie should go see her father.

She’s pulling on a sundress and running her fingers through hair curling from seawater, when she catches a sharp jaw and pair of dark sunglasses attached to a scrawny, pale form.

In a stupid band t-shirt.

She’d know that face anywhere.

Ben blinks and makes his way over.

“Uh...hey, Knope.”

“Hi.”

“What...uh…” he hugs her awkwardly and Leslie tenses. “Hi.”

“Hi. It’s...great to see you.”

It’s been at least nine months since they last crossed paths, at home for Christmas and both at JJ’s. Last she heard, Ben was dating someone in Indianapolis which is where his office is for the time being. He’s working for the state these days.

“How have you been?”

“Great!” she squares her shoulders, unsure why a lump is forming in her throat before she’s even left the beach. “So great! I’m starting a job in a few weeks and so is Ann and we’re just taking a vacation and...what about you?”

“Just...same...I had some vacation time and my mom thinks I don’t do that enough.”

“Right.”

“Right.”

They both shuffle their feet and lower their gazes at the same time.

“Where...you’re leaving?”

“I have...an errand to run. Ann’s staying here.”

“Oh,” Ben rubs his cheek that’s somehow even scruffier than she remembers. Does this man never shave?

“Well, uh, good to see you.”

“Yeah,” she pushes her hair out of her face. “You too,” Ben’s jaw slackens and she quickly adds they should get a coffee or something next time they’re both back in Pawnee.

Ben agrees with a smile even though he’ll never be back. He hates Pawnee.

“Sounds great,” he offers a nod and only seems a little startled when she tears off down the beach as quickly as her legs will carry her.

Her throat is still feeling tight and she’s not sure what to make of that.

*****

Nobody’s there but her and a few birds chirping pleasantly because they have no idea where they are. She envies them.

She hates being here.

She wants memories, not this. She wants to remember him cheerful and laughing, playing airplane and racing her through the park. She wants snuggles on the couch and reading excerpts from her dream journal, and…

She wants his  _ life _ , not this. Not a corpse decaying six feet under.

She has so much to tell him and she can’t bring herself to do it here. She wants to close her eyes and breathe deeply and picture his smiling face that gets a little harder to remember with each passing year. She settles on her knees as tears cloud her vision.

This isn’t her father; it’s just hard to remember that when she’s here.

But whether he’s here or not, the tightness in her throat is now a lump, she misses him so much it’s hard to keep from feeling dizzy, and she can’t stop the crying when it finally start.

“He liked scotch, right?”

The new voice is so unexpected Leslie almost yelps. She glances back and Ben is definitely there, fidgeting with a bottle of amber liquid. Leslie swipes at her cheeks and stands on wobbly legs.

“What...what are you doing here?”

An hour and a half from where she last left him. Ben steps forward, long fingers wrapping and unwrapping around the neck of the bottle nervously.

“This...is this weirdly overstepping?”

Yes? Probably? Why is he even here?

“You...you left...very abruptly and I was sort of...worried about you.”

“O-oh.”

“And then I remembered...this.”

“Oh.”

He lifts his other hand and reveals three shot glasses with tourist attractions on them. Leslie laughs, despite herself.

“It was all the gift shop had.”

“You hate scotch.”

He tilts his head like he’s surprised she remembered. She may have avoided him for most of college, but she remembers stuff like that.

“Yes, I do. And if I gag it up or spit it out, please don’t take offense Mr. Knope,” Ben salutes the headstone and that causes a cackle to escape. Ben snorts and sets the glasses on the top of the stone, pouring carefully.

“You remembered I hate scotch.”

“You remembered my dad loved it.”

When had they even talked about that?

“You mentioned it when I almost puked at that New Year’s Eve party,” he tilts his chin. “And I said I wonder if he would’ve liked me anyway.”

Leslie blinks. Had that happened? Ben straightens.

“Why’s he buried in Florida?”

Leslie takes the glass he hands her and shrugs

“His parents are buried here.”

“Your mom didn’t want him in Indiana?”

“She didn’t care. It’s not like he’s really here.”

Her cheeks are wet, and as soon as they wordlessly toast Robert Knope she starts to sob. Ben throws back his shot, makes a face, and then wraps her up.

“I miss him,” is all she manages to get out. Ben pushes his nose into her hair and exhales slowly.

“I know.”

“And I-I,” she hiccups. “I d-do want him to be pr-proud of me - ”

“He would be.”

“But I also just really miss him sometimes.”

Ben maneuvers them so they’re sitting on the grass, legs stretched out and backs against the stone. She cries into his chest for a while longer and Ben says nothing when she apologizes for his shirt.

“There’s a motel a few blocks that way,” she exhales. “I might get a room for the night and drink the rest of that scotch.”

“Ann will be worried.”

“I’ll call, of course.”

He takes her hand and she’s warm all over.  

“Are you going to think less of me for crying in front of you now?”

“As if that were possible.”

“Because you already think so little of me?”

Ben stiffens and tugs her head back to study her face.

“Leslie.”

“What?” it comes out more abrupt than she means it to, because for whatever animosity she might have held towards Ben, it’s good to have him here right now.

“How would you feel about...me staying too and maybe buying us burgers?”

He’s removed his sunglasses and his dark brown eyes are soft.

“If you keep your paws to yourself.”

*****

He does not keep his paws to himself.

That’s maybe her fault, though.

They eat burgers and finish the scotch (Leslie drinks most of it, Ben gags it down) and soon they’re sitting on a bed in a gross motel room, laughing hysterically as she recounts stories from her childhood.

At one point she’s smiling around a french fry and Ben reaches out to push hair off her shoulder. She’s cross-legged and he’s draped back on the pillows and his hand darts out, and their eyes meet, and…

Leslie doesn’t remember who moves first but seconds later she’s in his lap and kissing him, tasting salt and scotch and Ben Wyatt.

At one point Ben whispers they shouldn’t, (maybe because he has a girlfriend, she supposes), but his lips are smooth and his mouth is hot and Leslie can’t stop, not when it all feels so good. Things are moved from the bed and her dress goes flying with Ben’s shirt following. His teeth flash against the skin of her breast and his dick is already hard between her thighs and it's like she’s drowning, but kissing him is oxygen. Her mind is fuzzy, her throat aches with raw emotion and she just can’t get enough of him. Not tonight.

It’s unlike Leslie to forget about birth control, but Ben remembers and sinks into her with a long groan.

She’s had sex several times and she usually likes the other stuff better, the kissing, the touching, the  _ before _ . She thinks that during Ben’s first couple of thrusts.

And then he kisses her like he’s going off to war, tilts her hips and hikes her legs up, and her brain shuts off. It’s just panting and moaning and clawing at scratchy bedsheets, he varies his pace and trajectory, and his dick rubs against her clit with every pass. When she shatters, it’s with tiny explosions rippling throughout her body and she screams.

Afterwards, they slump together and Ben barely manages to find the energy to roll over and dispose of the condom.

While he does that, Leslie throws up in the bathroom. She returns to find Ben sprawled in the middle of the bed with a dopey, contented look on his face.

Her head is remarkably clear when she crawls in beside him and Ben curls around her, already snoring into her neck.

The sheets are flimsy, the air conditioning is on full blast, and when Ben mumbles “move over, Knope” he doesn’t mean further away. He pulls her back into his warmth and encases her in his arms.

She cries again. She doesn’t know why.

*****

In the morning Leslie can’t get out of there fast enough, which is a change of role for her. Normally she’s asking them to stay and wanting to cook breakfast, but today she needs to be alone.

Alone with Ann. Ann doesn’t count. She can be alone with Ann.

Ben looks hurt when she tries to tactfully excuse herself and a part of Leslie wants to run back and kiss him and promise she had a great time.

Because she did. Too great, probably.

He’s going back to Indianapolis in two days anyway, he’ll probably be relieved there are no long talks about feelings coming his way.

“You had sex with  _ Ben _ ? Where did you even see him?”

Leslie hides her face in her hands and groans. Ann pats her shoulder.

“How was it?”

Great, wonderful, amazing, soul-satiating and everything romantic comedies tell you sex is supposed to be.

But he’ll be back in Indianapolis and she’ll be back in Pawnee and that’s that. Wham, bam, thank you, sir.

*****

Her first project at the Pawnee Parks Department is getting her boss, Ron Swanson, to tolerate her. He’s a good person, she thinks, they just don’t share a lot of the same views.

A little conflict is good, right?

Her second project is  _ event nights _ .

She starts with movie nights, set to begin in the spring so families have a place to go on Fridays where they can enjoy the beauty of Pawnee’s parks.

The first one she spends three days setting up for and everything is perfect by the time the sun sets that evening. The movie is Mary Poppins.

Leslie’s sitting on a blanket in the back row when a voice echoes behind her.

“Move over, Knope.”

Her heart’s instantly in her throat.

She knows that voice. She hasn’t heard that voice since…

Ben sits on the blanket and hands her another bag of popcorn from the cart that’s been making it fresh all day. She’s full to the brim, but she thanks him and eats a few kernels. It’s warm and buttery and she hasn’t even turned her head to look at Ben, but his presence is nice.

She finally glances over.

He’s in jeans and a t-shirt and his hair is messy. Leslie smiles.

“This is amazing.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Just passing through.”

She might lean into his shoulder towards the end of the movie.

He helps tidy up afterwards, and stands beside her smiling as kids and parents thank them profusely for their efforts.

It’s possibly the best day of her life. Her first real Parks project was a success - she’s on cloud nine.

And Ben’s there to witness it.

She  _ thanks him _ for his help when they’re at her car and Ben hugs her quickly and leaves in a hurry.

She smiles anyway.

*****

Ann doesn’t work the next movie night, so she shows up with her newest boyfriend. They’re gearing up to laugh hysterically during Toy Story when popcorn is deposited in front of Leslie again.

“Move over, Knope.”

Ann’s eyes go wide and Leslie shifts to make room.

“Just passing through?”

“Uh, something like that.”

Ann offers to stay and help her clean up, but Leslie only half hears her because Ben’s trying to explain why claymation is such an important part of mainstream culture and how these principles were incorporated into the film.

She’s giggling because he’s ridiculous, and Ann just kisses her cheek and says she’ll call her tomorrow.

They hug again afterwards and Ben says next time she should do an “adults only” film after the family movie.

“What would you put on?”

“Blade Runner.”

Leslie rolls her eyes.

*****

“You liked it.”

She grins and he nudges her with his elbow.

“You liiiiiiiked it.”

“It was okay.”

They’re still snickering, scooping empty bags of popcorn into garbage bins, when he decides to drop a bomb.

“Why did you leave?”

Her head snaps back.

“What?”

“That morning. Why did you leave?”

She forgets how to speak and finally stammers something about thinking he wouldn’t want her there.

Ben’s expression is unreadable and he kind of slumps his shoulders.

“See you around, Knope.”

An overwhelming wave of sadness overcomes her as she watches him walk away.

*****

He doesn’t come to the next movie night.

Her heart is heavy as she tries to reach a sign she had Ron tape to a pole. Now that Ben’s a constant in her life again, she misses him terribly when he’s not there.

“Move over, I got this.”

Leslie whirls so fast she falls into him.

“Ben!”

He catches her and smiles, but it doesn’t touch his eyes.

“Were you just passing through?”

“No,” he shifts his weight and inhales sharply. “I came because you’re here and I’ve had the biggest crush on you since high school and I needed that to be clear, even though you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you!”  her heart is instantly racing.

“It feels like you do.”

“I don’t! You...I never hated you!” she gestures frantically. “You are kind of a jerk sometimes, sure, but you’re very sweet otherwise and whenever I need you, you seem to be there and - ” she squeaks when his lips find hers and he kisses her hard, fingers carding through her hair. Ben pulls back and checks her face and tries to smile. Leslie feels her mouth mirroring his and yanks him in again. It’s just like that night in Florida, only better and more honest or something. Ben lifts her into him and she laughs and pushes her tongue insistently against his. It’s slower than before also, softer and more thorough.

“Do you...um, want to help me take everything to my car and go somewhere we can talk?”

“Yes.”

He grabs her hand.

*****

“Come here,” Ben tugs her across the mattress and into his arms. Leslie sighs and rubs her nose against his throat. It sounds so much better than  _ move over _ .

She climbs on top of him and exhales. “Here?”

“Perfect.”

“You really had a crush on me for that long?”

Ben’s mouth twitches. “Uh huh.”

He tugs the blankets up over them and they snuggle close. Leslie whispers “me too” and she feels Ben’s teeth on her skin.

“You’re not getting rid of me anymore. You’re my favorite person, Leslie Knope.”

Her chest constricts as his thumb swipes against her lip.

He _ might  _ be up there as hers too.

Even when he’s being a jerk.

A stupidly sweet, romantic, jerk.


End file.
